The Slytherin mind — the mind of a true Slytherin, one who wants to be in the house, and chooses to be in the house, and one who belongs there, besides — is not a mind you can cheat. Not really.
Suppose you were to tell it fantastic fairy stories of certain blessed beings who are pure and good and deserve all they have by virtue of their birth, and certain wicked muddy brown things that come in like intruders in the night. Well, one who simply wants to be a Slytherin might believe you, inflamed as they are by a need to be superior, and perhaps also possessed of an adorable childish credulity. Such a being would gladly reduce the world to Mr. Nott’s fables.
But the truly cunning Slytherin would know better. She would become, after some time, too disillusioned for your bedtime stories.
Suppose you were to demand that the Slytherins line themselves all up in rows, heed the call to arms, show the world their stunning power, lie and cheat and steal and kill in the name of some grand cause, toss away even their freedom to demonstrate that their way — the Slytherin way — is better than all the rest. Those who idolize the house and all it stands for would surely be first in line. But those are not the most Slytherin of Slytherins. Not really. Oh, they want to be. But already they prize house and creed above their own survival, and what sort of snake is that?
Suppose you were to present a Slytherin with one path forward — only one. “Here is the road you must take,” you will say. And it leads to a dank and destructive future, a cold cell in Azkaban, certain death for friend and foe alike. It is as unappealing and as likely to sicken one, as horrible, as those midnight swims in the lake the wild-eyed snake-girl prefects dare to take, protected only by Dark and forbidden magic, desperate to bait and kill a merman in the name of house and home and purest blood.
Oh, but the snake-girl prefects are too wild to be true Slytherins. No true Slytherin would take such a plunge. No true Slytherin would destroy themselves in that manner. Someone who rather likes the idea of Slytherin would. But not someone who embodies the house. Given only one terrible path, the true Slytherin would not jump headlong into it. She would carve out a second path. This is the way of the cunning survivalist.
And so it is that Andromeda wakes in the night, and remembers being tugged into the lake on a dare, and remembers almost drowning, and remembers the strong-armed Hufflepuff who pulled her out and wrapped her in his coat, and promised not to tell.
And then her sister, her hair sodden and dark, the merman’s skull in one hand, the shiny P on her chest glinting, coming upon her and saying, “Oh, darling, of course I’m sorry. But don’t you see? If we’d drowned, at least we would have drowned together.”
"Not me," Andromeda had said. "You drown. Not me."
Well that’s just grape. The vote was bananamous, and the cherryman was impeached after being charged with a melony. His replacement has already been oranged. It just seems weird tomato, like apearantly fruit jokes don’t seem to appley berry well to politics.
This morning while I was getting ready I was watching Sesame Street.
They were doing this bit where some clown was trying to wash his hands but kept washing his feet or his elbows and Elmo would go, “no mister noodle, your HANDS!” and all the tv kids would laugh.
Around the fourth or fifth time he couldn’t find his hands, I heard a grown man yell from somewhere else in the motel, “GODDAMMIT, MR. NOODLE.”
LITERALLY MY FAVORITE STORY ON ALL OF TUMBLR.
IM GOING TO STAB MYSELF IN THE FOOT I JUST SENT MY ENGLISH TEACHER MY ESSAY ON HAMLET AND IT WAS STILL NAMED “the fresh prince of denmark yo holla”
DID YOU GUYS KNOW JENGA MADE A NEW VERSION OF THEIR GAME, BUT INSTEAD OF STRAIGHT BORING WOODEN ONES, ITS TETRIS PIECES
THATS RIGHT, ITS MOTHER FUCKING TETRIS JENGA
THE TWO OF THE MOST STRESSFUL GOD DAMNED GAMES WE PLAYED AS CHILDREN ROLLED INTO ONE
ＹＯＵ ＨＡＶＥ ＢＥＥＮ ＶＩＳＩＴＥＤ ＢＹ ＴＨＥ ＰＵＲＰＬＥ ＳＰＡＣＥ ＤＯＧＥ ＯＦ ＨＯＭＥＷＯＲＫ．
Ｅｖｅｒｙ ｔｉｍｅ ｈｅ ａｐｐｅａｒｓ ｏｎ ｙｏｕｒ ｄａｓｈｂｏａｒｄ ｙｏｕ ｈａｖｅ ｔｏ ｓｐｅｎｄ ５ ＭＩＮＵＴＥＳ ｄｏｉｎｇ ｙｏｕｒ ＨＯＭＥＷＯＲＫ ｏｒ ＷＨＡＴＥＶＥＲ ＴＨＡＴ ＩＳ ＴＨＡＴ ＹＯＵ ＷＡＳ ＳＵＰＰＯＳＥＤ ＴＯ ＢＥ ＤＯＩＮＧ ＲＩＧＨＴ ＮＯＷ． Ｗｈｉｃｈ ｓｕｒｅｌｙ ｉｓ ｎｏｔ ＢＬＯＧＧＩＮＧ．
ＧＯＯＤ ＬＵＣＫ ＦＲＩＥＮＤ！（∪ ・ω・）ノ
Reblog or she’ll be in your room tonight..
OH MY GOD
SORRY GUYS BUT
Rebloging for that ^
Okay, I’m going to make this post ONCE and that’s all.
Many of you have probably seen the above gif floating around the internet. It’s been reposted on Tumblr(one post has over 137K notes and wasn’t credited at all) what seems like a hundred times, it’s showed up on Imgur, Reddit, iFunny and other places around the internet. I’ve seen people fight about “posting it first” and arguing with others who had “reposted it from them”. I’ve seen people confuse it with behind the scenes footage from The Avengers(??) and I’ve seen people credit other cosplayers and cosplay groups for it.
This gif belongs to me. It was created last year around this time for fun and the original post had two other gifs that went along with it. So not only were myself and my fellow cosplaying friend not credited but the whole gifset wasn’t even seen. I want to set the record straight now because I’ve seen hundreds of comments around the internet of people asking where this came from and very few had the correct answer for it.
Original post: Do I look like a reindeer to you?
Loki: the-bucky-barnes (DA Account )
Tony Stark: colonel-bastard
And you can look at my Loki Cosplay Tag for other photos and gif sets(yes there are a lot more!).
PLEASE REBLOG THIS, I want to get the word out there as much as possible. And please, please, please do not steal and repost cosplay material from someone without properly crediting the source! Thank you!